Mommy Guilt and Mama Bear

I have spent the last couple of days worrying about our youngest. She's 12 weeks old and so insanely skinny. She hasn't gained any weight in over a month. Not for lack of trying. We have a nephew that is 5 weeks old and weighs more than our little peanut. I know that I shouldn't worry too much, my other two were just like this. I can't help it though. Why do I make such skinny babies?! It's not like she doesn't eat. I was up with her at least 3 maybe 4 times last night feeding her. She's just tiny. I just can't get over the fact that moms have so much guilt in their lives. I have heard before that if I feel guilty about something I do as a mother, it just makes me a good mother since I am thinking about what I am doing. I don't want to feel any guilt at all. I am doing the best I can with the skills that I have as a parent. Yet I still don't feel like I am good enough. Why do we live in a society that puts so much pressure on kids (and their parents) to be the best? Why can't we all just be team parents? Rah parenthood!! Instead parents are constantly "one-upping" each other, putting each other down, etc. I know that Eleanor Roosevelt said “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”, but it sure is hard to not let people get into your head. I think even with really good self-esteem, it's hard to not beat yourself up over some of the things people say to one another. Whether it's the "breastfeeding vs. formula feeding" debate or "natural birth vs. c-section" debate, it's always something. Why can't we just be happy with healthy, happy kids? I know I am just repeating everything that everyone else is already saying, but in the location we are currently living it feels like a rat race. It feels like I don't look the part, I don't talk the part. Really, I don't care! I am who I am...if you don't like me, I don't really care. However, if you don't like my kids or you can't respect my kids for who they are, prepare to meet Mama Bear. I am teaching my kids to respect adults and kids. The least you can do is try to show my child respect. My oldest child is a very happy, fun girl. She loves her classmates and isn't afraid to show that. Unfortunately (or fortunately) she shows her feelings outwardly. I have reminded her about 10 billion times that not all friends like to be hugged. (It's a hard lesson) Anyway, last school year her class was showing their parents what they do in one of the "specials" (music, science, wellness, etc) classes. My daughter was so excited to be in the classroom with not only her friends (seriously this child sees EVERYONE peer as a friend) and their parents that she ran up to another student and hugged her. About that time I overheard a mother in the room behind me say "That S girl is such an ugly child, I really hope her parents medicate her soon". I wanted to throw up or jump up and throttled that mother. Luckily she said it to a friend of mine who immediately said "Oh you because SV? We LOVE the V family!! They are great!" I am pretty sure that my daughter doesn't need to be medicated and I personally think she is beautiful! let me just state that this person's child is a very sweet girl and I adore being around her. I just hope we don't have another round like that with the mother or I might get into trouble. Anyway....it's funny how feelings can go from guilt to frustration so quickly for a mother. I just hope as my 3 kiddos grow bigger and wiser and more independent, I am able to keep the guilty feeling to a minimum and the mama bear in her cage!